take care of yourself

Validation Strategies: Bonus - Validate Yo Self!!

Validation isn't just for external relationships. If you want to take it to the next level with some upper division therapy shit, try the validation strategies on yourself. I'll be doing bonus blogs with each validation strategy to give pointers for how to validate yourself so you can heal and strengthen your relationship with you.


Strategy one: show up!

Real talk: How often to you show up for yourself? How often do you really take the time to check in? If your gut tries to get a hold of you, do you take the call or let it go to a voicemail you rarely check? Do you make uninterrupted time to be with yourself or do you spend alone time frantically distracting?

If a friend did to you what you do to yourself, how would you feel? Maybe sad and alone. Maybe hurt. Maybe pissed. Maybe resentful. Maybe you just give up on sharing important details about your thoughts, feelings, needs, boundaries, and values.

So often we disconnect from ourselves then wonder why we feel disconnected from our lives and our relationships. How could I fully listen to another if I'm not willing to listen to myself? How can I assert a need or a boundary if I don't know what they are? How can I express my emotions to someone if I don't how I feel?

Your relationship with yourself is SO important! If you feel like it needs some help, try paying attention to you. Start with planning some alone time, free of distraction. Maybe take a walk in nature or journal or meditate. Create a time to check in and pay attention, even just once a week or few a few min a day. It may take a while to grow, heal, or rebuild your relationship with yourself. It may not always be easy. It may not always be convenient. But you're worth it!

Treat Yourself! Self Care Week 1

I have made big lists on self-care and have posted about my lists.  The other day I thought to myself, when I see those big lists that others put together, it sometimes feels overwhelming.  So this time I am going to tell you guys just one little thing you can do to take care of yourself, and you can decide if you want to try it out or not.  If you think you want to try it, do it daily or every few days for one week and see how it goes.  

Things you will need:

  • A bathtub or a hot tub
  • Candles, many of them
  • Something to set them on
  • Matches
  • Cozy robe or your favorite towel
  • Neck rest / rolled up towel


  • Bubble bath
  • A book
  • Music
  • Lights / no lights
  • Locked door
  • Incense

This is time out for you and nobody is allowed to intrude or come to you with problems.  

**Disclaimer**I have to give full credit to my husband who is “making” me do this several times a week and I loooove it.  It was his idea.  He actually set this all up for me, but anybody can set this up and do it for themselves and it will still feel amazing.

Enjoy week #1! Each week we will add a new self-care habit to keep you refreshed and focused on yourself.

Always remember, you are not able to fully give to others or to your relationship if you are depleted and drained.  This is the year of YOU.  Take charge and be selfish in the best possible way so that you can give in the best possible way.